girlofprey

I'm back from my holiday.

Suffice to say, it was probably the worst holiday I've ever been on in my life.

Details to follow, probably. For now, internet.

The holiday is on Friday. I'm feeling a bit better about it - mostly because D from the Hospice called asking me to work that week, and I realised there really were less fun things I could be doing. Apparently our boss is off - she has regular problems with her nerves, and I'm guessing that's the issue since I was being called for a shift two weeks beforehand. Which is probably not making things very easy for D, who was only supposed to be working ad hoc and a couple of shifts a week while the building work was happening. But that's how it is, unfortunately. At least there are no patients in that might be affected by any turmoil. Anyway. I still think, as I realised last week, that my ideal holiday of the moment would be a week away with just me and my parents, or a week here with just me and my parents. Just a nice long time without my nephews coming down or any childcare at all. But like I say - I've realised there were less fun things I could be doing. Also I got really excited to see Suicide Squad, and that's out literally on Friday, and not something I could really take the kids to see as a fun activity while we're away. Well, there's a midnight showing on Thursday. But I don't I'd enjoy what that would do to my sleep schedule. Also there's a good-looking game that everyone's been excited for for months out next Tuesday, so I can't try it out myself and form my own opinions before the internet makes up its mind. But I can wait.

Luckily I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow, to review my medication, which will be a good chance to get it renewed before it runs out next week. Assuming she continues my medication, but I don't see why she wouldn't when it's working really well for me. And then - god it's weird how packed my schedule feels, when there's not really that much in it. I've got the holiday next week, then I'll probably be back at the hospice, then at the end of August we'll be going to Insomnia, a games convention, then it'll be September and my sister's birthday and Back To School. And then it'll be October, when I have two trips with LJ pals lined up. And then it'll be practically Christmas. I guess I'm more amazed at how time flies.

I did finally get on and try to apply for Jobseeker's online. It turns out I can't apply if I've received ESA in the last calendar month. Which is really weird, when the guy who called to tell me about my assessment decision offered to transfer me to the Jobseeker's department there and then. But anyway. I have to wait. Which I discovered after quite a lot of confusing searching. Thanks, government. I guess I can start looking for work though.

I'm back from holiday.

( The holiday )

So here's what we decided in the end:

Mum, dad and the kids are going on holiday today. I'm going to stay behind, and then go up on the train on Wednesday (maybe Tuesday if I'm feeling up for it) and spend the last couple of days with them. It gives me a chance to recharge my batteries, do some of the stuff I planned to do this week when I thought I wasn't going at all, and when I do go it'll be a bit easier knowing it's only for a few days.

It turned out to be a pretty good thing I wasn't going with mum and dad though. Not needing the extra seat means they have room for more stuff, and - man. Today when they were packing the house was more bag than house. Dad's already told me I may as well get a return ticket on the train, because there probably won't be space for me coming back either. Mum then quietly, half-jokingly begged me for my space on the train, so she didn't have to come back in the car. Maybe there will be room by next Saturday - there's a lot of stuff that might be eaten or used up over the course of the week. Still, that's self-catering (British) holidays for you. With three kids.

Meanwhile, my sister called last night because my ON was at ours, and I had to fight with him to get him to come off the computer and talk to her. When he passed the phone off to mum, apparently my sister asked her if I was 'like a kid with him' when we fought, and when mum said no, she's an adult and he's a child, my sister asked 'is she too much like an adult, is she too full on?'. Then she said she'd been 'thinking about it over the past couple of weeks, and -', and my mum cut her off, because holiday stuff, and because my sister has no right to tell us how to behave with her kid when she's not here, bar us abusing him. But apparently she's been thinking about it. Fuck's sake.

Anyway. My plan is to get my bedroom a bit tidier while my parents are away. It seems almost impossible, but I feel like I'm close to having it actually tidy? I need to make a list, but I spent the morning wrapping a few ornaments in bubble-wrap to take them to the charity shop. They're all ready to go now. Most of my other stuff is either going there or to the library, or somewhere specific, apart from a couple of region 1 dvds. I'm going to have a look in a drawer under my bed and get rid of some old books I don't look at anymore, and then hopefully I can put some of my many boxes under there. And then I'll have the whole side of my bed back, and a bedside table that doesn't have anything in I don't think. And then when I clear a few sides - I'll be almost done, I think. Yippee!

Partly related to this, I am sort of re-reading a book at the moment where the bad guy is called Zebulon, while also playing a computer game where the bad guy is called Zarpedon. I don't need this many Z---on people in my life.

I am back from Nine Worlds, and it was good, and I am tired. I returned with 4 new books and a beautiful tiny jar of Pure Honey.

But for the past few weeks/months we've been talking about taking my YN away to Scarborough for the weekend since he never gets to go abroad on holidays, and mum has now realised that she is working every other weekend before the school holidays end (??? I guess), so she thinks we should go away this weekend. She basically told me 'don't unpack'. I AM SO TIRED, and I have volunteering and CBT this week, and I wanted to maybe go to Leeds but hahaha. I love Scarborough and my YN a lot, but I don't know if I can manage. Maybe I should float the idea of just going for the day somehow.

I am still bang into Far Cry 3, have enduring love for Borderlands and Handsome Jack, and am still often in the back of my head thinking about Dragon Age. Is this the time for Guardians of the Galaxy fic to take off and for there to be a bunch of fic I want to read? No.

( Coronation Street, tw for cancer and suicide )

I went to Blackpool! It was lovely, even though the weather was changeable enough to make it difficult. The first night we were there it was just throwing it down all night. On Saturday it started out dry at least, then the sun came out and I was wondering around without a coat for a bit. Then there was a thunderstorm. It was funny actually, mum and I were in a cafe on a pier - which was already rocking because of the water underneath - just eating lunch, and then I noticed one of the girls from behind the counter asking if any of the other workers minded if she borrowed a jumper, and putting it over her head before she ran outside. Then we just heard the rain, sheeting down on the roof and outside. People started running in to take cover. Then the thunder started rolling. It was like being on the Ark. Like we were the last people in the world safe from the rain. One poor woman ran in with her kid, completely drenched, and told whoever she was meeting in the cafe that they'd been at the top of the big wheel when it started coming down. It let up enough that mum and I managed to leave, and we were planning to go to the Sealife centre just down the road anyway. When we came out it was dry again, and it was just sort of drizzling on and off for the rest of the night. It got cold though. The next day it was sunny in the morning, and then just started raining and showering for the last few hours we were there. There was a train at 2 and a train at 4, but we were both knackered and the weather was terrible, so we ended up going at 2. Then on the way home there was a rainbow over the Pennines. British weather, eh?

So it was a little difficult, but it was lovely, and I glad we went. We stayed in a great B&B on the North shore, so it was really quiet, but within walking distance of everything. On Saturday we went up the Tower, which I'd never been to before. We watched the dancers in the ballroom, including one young couple who must have been professionals and were amazing, had a drink in the cafe looking out over the sea (ocean?), where I had the finest traybake I've ever had in my life. I'm not sure any other will ever compare to it. Then we went to the top of the Tower - we had to have a 4D Experience on the way, but I did learn some interesting things, like that there are more B&B and hotel beds in Blackpool than in all of Portugal. Weird. The views from the top were lovely, as the sun was out at that point, and I did do the Skywalk, but I think the effect was spoiled a bit by the scaffolding a few stories below us. Anyway. Then we went and looked round the Winter Gardens, where mum said she'd gone back in the 60s, and walked down to the Central Pier and had lunch. Thunderstorm, and then the Sealife Centre, which was lovely, but they did have a weird attitude to their sharks. Telling you all about how sharks are endangered and not to buy products made from sharks one minute, and then playing Jaws-style music in the tunnel and selling shark's teeth in the shop the next. Didn't know what to make of that. But it was nice to see the fish.

Then mum and I walked down to the south pier and Pleasure Beach, but we were pretty knackered at that point and possibly about to do our feet an injury, so we just had dinner and went back to a bar near out B&B on the tram. I tried a Strawberry Daiquiri, finally, which was lovely, but as it was made in a Wetherspoons from what was apparently a pre-made mixer, I suspect it still wasn't the genuine article. Anyway. The next day we were both tired and it kept raining, so we just walked the opposite way up the North shore, came up from the slipway and walked to the end of the illuminations - all the way to Bispham station - then walked back, had some lunch and went for the train. Mum was talking about staying till the 4 o'clock train, but I don't know what else we would have done there. We were both tired, our feet were killing us, I didn't want to walk back into town anyway, and it was raining. And it had forecasted thundery hailstorms for later on. So we came back. And that was our weekend in Blackpool. It was grand.

I also went into Wakefield last week to try to get my netbook sorted out, or get some tips on fixing it. I don't think I ever posted about it, but I went to jekesta's on the 4th and took my netbook with me, and it connected to her wireless internet immediately. In Wakefield, in the shop where I bought it, it also connected to their internet immediately. So the guy said it couldn't really be the computer, or the software, because it was staying connected and loading webpages. He said it must be our router, somehow, even though all our other computers can connect through it. There might be something I can do with changing the internet options on the netbook, apparently, but he couldn't do anything there because I wasn't on my dad's network. So his only advice was to call our internet provider and talk to them about it. I'm not looking forward to that really. But it's the only thing being suggested at the moment. And if they can't help, the guy said I could bring it back and send it to them for a service, and he'd make sure it went even though there was nothing to say it was a problem with the machine itself, but he wasn't sure there'd be anything to fix, you know? Sigh. It's a conundrum, this netbook. But I may as well keep at it. One thing he did say was that registering my warranty online, like I was being prompted to do at jekesta's, wasn't an issue, and I'd have a warranty whether I did that or not, which was the only thing I was freaking out about. So at least that's not such an issue.

Other than that I'm mostly watching Coronation Street and replaying Oblivion. I've been replaying a lot of my old RPGs lately, but Oblivion's a slightly more serious one because I wasn't really that bothered about it when it came out. I bought it in 2011, when I finally got a laptop that could cope with it, and I kind of rushed through it so I'd be all caught up when Skyrim came out. And the Empire/Cyrodiil was always my least favourite part of the Elder Scrolls world. But now I'm going through it properly and have thought a bit more about my character and class, I'm enjoying it a lot more. The number one thing that still irks me though is that Foxglove Nectar doesn't have the Damage Health effect. Foxglove is like one the deadliest plants in the world. Worse than Nightshade, I think. It should definitely be a poison, I SHOULD BE ABLE TO MAKE THE BEST POISONS EVER WITH IT. Bethesda!

Also I bought Scribblenauts Unlimited because it was £3.74 on Steam. Fun!

Oh my God, I'm going away tomorrow. TOMORROW. I'm feeling sort of calm about it though, or at least I was until half an hour ago when I started getting my clothes out and stuff. Possibly I was in some sort of eye-of-the-hurricane sort of denial. Mostly though, I'm hoping it's going to be a fairly easygoing holiday, in a sense. Like, we're taking my two eldest nephews, so I assume we're going to be mostly running around with/after them, and I'm hoping because of that we're not going to try to fit in a lot of sight-seeing or shopping or whatever. Dad made noises when we booked it about how "it should be a holiday for us, too", but I think maybe he's kidding himself on that score. As long as he doesn't try to push the issue, I think we should be fine.

I'm also not going to have a room to myself, for the first holiday in a while. I'm sharing with my ON, and our room's connected to my parents and MN's room. So I won't have anywhere to go be alone if I feel like I need it, which might be tricky. But then as long as we're around the hotel, the room will probably be empty most of the day if I need a break. I don't know what to expect about when the kids will go to sleep on a night, but it's not like I'm used to early nights at the moment. Although I'm not used to early mornings. Well, we'll see.

So anyway. Yes. I'm going away for a week. If you don't hear from me, that is why. I'm a little wound up about it and a little not. So, see you in a week.

And in fandom news from the past few weeks:

• Allie Brosh's book is apparently available in October. I assumed, what with how ill she's been, that she just wouldn't have been working on it, but no, apparently it's coming soon. Which pleases me. I haven't seen anyone else talking about it, so in case you're interested and hadn't heard, there's the link.



• I'm getting on with the main plot in Fallout 3 again, and you know, the more I think about the storyline, the more annoyed I am about what a wasted opportunity I think Bethesda had. ( Spoilers for Fallout 3 and Fallout: New Vegas )



• I have been listening to this fanmix, and I want to rec it, because it makes me really happy. so maybe it would make you guys happy too. I didn't even know Electro Swing was a thing, but apparently it is. Also, it's a fanmix for Benny/F!Courier from Fallout: New Vegas, so if you ship that, you may love it doubly hard. NB: I cannot be held accountable if you don't love it.

And I was going to talk about some of the animals my cat has been bringing in as 'presents' lately, but I remembered in my last post I said I wasn't going to make another post about animal death for a while. Suffice it to say, I'm half horrified and half impressed.

And in the last few weeks, I saw three films. Three whole films.

The first two weeks ago was The Internship, which I saw mainly because it had Vince Vaughn in it and he looked like he might not be a dick to people in it. Which I was correct about! Although there were some slightly odd things in the film, overall he and Owen Wilson were both quite nice, and quite nice to other people. It was a slightly odd film - a lot of the scenes sort of felt like they were ad-libbed, and maybe they should have done more ad-libbing until they got something better/funnier. And the ending was basically a big ass-kiss to Google. But overall I enjoyed. And I somehow got a fluff pairing out of it. ( Mild spoilers )

Unfortunately, Vince Vaughn has turned out to be the latest actor I liked who disappointed me horribly, mainly by having fairly shady politics. It's nothing that would make me want to stop watching him, but apparently he's agreed to make a conservative TV show about his politics. So the night is young!

Speaking of which, I'd forgotten that the next Mark Wahlberg film I was looking forward to also featured Denzel Washington trying to do a comedy role for once, which I wanted to support. I may go see it. For Denzel.

Anyway. Then last week, I went to see Now You See Me and Pacific Rim.

( Now You See Me, some spoilers )

( Pacific Rim, some probably pretty big spoilers )

I think that's all my fandom news. Also I have started listening to Welcome To Night Vale, but I think I mentioned that in the last post. Also a few other things. But these are the main ones I think.

I'm going to Leeds tomorrow with my mother, because we are going on holiday with my two oldest nephews in less than two weeks. I need some holiday clothes. But I don't know exactly what I need or want. So tomorrow will probably be interesting, to say the least.

David.

I have to go to bed pretty shortly because I'm going on a trip with my mum and YN tomorrow, and I have to be up at quarter to 8. Whimper. We are going to Cannon Hall farm though, to hopefully see lambs and baby goats and calves. So that's all good.

Also I have agreed to go on holiday with my parents and ON and MN this year. In about six weeks in fact. We're going to Spain, and it'll be the first time my nephews have been on a plane, and I thought it might be nice to be there for that. And I was feeling sort of up for a holiday with them this year. But the fact we'll also be running around with them in the blazing sunshine in a foreign country might be a strain though. I am looking forward to it, I'm just also a little wary of what it might actually be like. We'll see I guess.

What it also means is that I'm going to have to get my passport renewed pretty quickly, which currently costs £80. So money will probably be a little tight over the next few weeks. Up until I need to start saving to go away, probably.

Things. Other things I keep meaning to post about. At the moment it's mostly David Platt. And Only You by Ellie Goulding.