girlofprey

I'm still playing Yakuza 7. It's quite rare for me to continue on with a game after I've beaten the main story, but Yakuza 7 just makes every little thing so full of personality, even just running around the streets, that I'm still enjoying it. Currently I'm mostly torn up about whether I want to start New Game+ or not. I do, because I want to play through the story again, and you keep plenty of your progress and upgrades from the game, but not all of them, and I don't like the idea of even a little gap before being able to get back to the advanced stuff I'm doing now. Also you can just watch all the story cutscenes you've unlocked from the main menu, I've discovered, if you want to do that. But watching the cutscenes isn't really like playing through it again.

Fandom has not written the pairing I love. To be fair, I've once again come into an established fandom in love with the new character, not the one that's been established for seven games, so there's not that much fic for 7 compared to the other games anyway. There is one fic for my pairing, and it's a short thing in a kink bingo series, and another that's marked for my pairing but is clearly really about another pairing and had a lot of body horror I wasn't expecting, so that wasn't exciting. Also fandom in general doesn't seem in love with my second favourite character - my favourite is the main character, and he might be one of my favourite fictional characters ever - and...like, I could be wrong and crazy but if my second favourite character isn't the main antagonist going forward then I don't understand narrative anymore. I feel genuinely convinced that canon will support me, but that's still not a guarantee, and even so they might decide to pick up his arc in three games time, and the next game is already so far away. So I'm just sitting here, hoping someone somewhere in the world will just come talk to me about him. I mean, ideally they will talk about him on their own blog or Tumblr, so I can find it and won't have to make the first move, but either way. Find me, internet soulmate. Write me a thirty-chapter fic about conflict and slow-burn UST, and trying to deal with someone you just don't know how to deal with.

Happy Easter.

It's spring :)

And I have finished Yakuza 7. Another thing I wasn't used to is exactly how long Yakuza game stories are, so despite there being numbered chapters I could never quite tell if things were just coming to a head or just gearing up. But all of a sudden I found myself in the 'Finale' chapter - and then I was concerned, given how recent big fights had gone, that I might have to grind for weeks just to beat the last fight and see the ending. But then I accidentally learned the trick to levelling up fast, so I got to just go into it. So now I'm done with the story, and can look for fic. The fic of my dreams probably won't be around, but I can look and hope anyway.

Marilyn Monroe



My life currently consists of playing through Yakuza 7: Like A Dragon and trying to catch a stringfish in Animal Crossing before March is out. I love Yakuza 7 though. But I suspected I would since I saw that trailer where the main character looks up into a sky filled with fireworks and says "Everything will work out. Just like in Dragon Quest", and I whispered to the screen "I will protect you".

The first week of the year was interesting to say the least. Hopefully we're not starting as we mean to go on.

I don't know, I'm very blah and deflated at the moment. Everything is terrifying. I don't know what the rest of the year holds for me at all - I had a vague idea of looking for work in spring, when things will hopefully be better, but I feel like we're not through with the business bankruptcies yet, and if there's a chance I can hold out and get the vaccine, that would also be worth doing. I'm not particularly interested in getting long Covid, or long-term problems that show up a year or two or ten after being infected. But then there are stories of people who had the vaccine then getting the disease, and people are a little bit sketchy about the government messing with the vaccine schedule anyway. I don't know. January and February are always kind of crap, but now it seems to have extra greyness and uncertainty to it.

Mum was scared to go shopping today, for the first time since the whole thing started. I mean, I think she's been scared before, but yesterday she was actively looking for ways not to do it. She looked up online deliveries for Morrisons, and then debated just going to Marks and Spencers (rather than M&S then Morrisons) and trying to make do with the food in there, for a week. Marks and Spencers were apparently doing a little more in terms of precautions than Morrisons have been doing, only allowing a certain number of trolleys/people into the shop at one time. She cheered when the news about Morrisons enforcing mask wearing came out yesterday. She did go today, to both shops, and said it was noticeably quieter and emptier than it has been for a while. Maybe people are finally taking this seriously.

I have started playing Borderlands 2 again. It doesn't seem like a way to broaden my horizons, but it does seem like the game with the least darkness I can think of, and the most colours, which I think will suit my TV screen better. It is an amazing game, though. Maybe it's just nostalgia, but it just feels refreshing in a way so many games don't, like there's a real sense of space. And just a focus on one or two mechanics, done well, rather than a bunch of things all jumping for your attention at once, which feel super limited when you actually pay attention to them. Anyway. Also, I get to play Maya, after they did her dirty in Borderlands 3. Oh I love Maya. I have also been playing the Sims again, which I think is just because I crave the outside and more interactions with animals. My character adopted 2 stray dogs, and they made the most beautiful offspring in the world.

I have also been watching TV. The Great is on on Sunday nights - I intended to watch that last year, for Women's Month, and now it turns out you can't really get the whole thing anywhere in the UK legitimately, and the one 'unofficial' site I tried gave me a bad experience I just don't need at the moment. You can't even download the whole boxset on 4, it's just coming out one episode at a time, and that's it. I'm really enjoying it, as I assumed I would given the glowing reviews last year, and I will let you know my full thoughts on it in eight weeks' time. I've also been watching Traces on the BBC with mum and dad. The Guardian gave it a 2 out of 5 last week, but I'm really enjoying it. It stretches at reality a bit and has the same 'small world' syndrome a lot of modern crime stories have, but the acting's really nice and believable, and there are so many women. Talking to each other. The subject matter is a bit difficult, obviously, but I'd say it's still worth a watch if you don't mind murder mysteries.

It feels very strange not to be buying things. Usually that's how it goes, you have Christmas, and then after Christmas I go looking for all the stuff I suggested but didn't get, or that was too niche to suggest, and try to buy it in the January sales. But now I just don't want to spend money, with the future being so uncertain. I'm not exactly badly off, but I could be with a few expensive purchases. Money isn't going into my bank account anymore, and I have to remember that. So that's another thing I'd normally be doing at this time of year, and can't do. Also my mum's (second) Christmas present still hasn't arrived. The company have sent me about 3 emails revising the expected delivery date, so at this point I just don't expect it when they say anymore. Maybe it'll be here by June. In time for mum's birthday.

There will not be a Slashies tonight, as there are so few entries it wouldn't really be a competition. However, here's a recap of my year:

• I went to RHS Harlow Carr in January, and I really enjoyed it. I liked the winter-scented garden, I liked the pine forest section, I liked the colourful winter willow plants. It was a trip to get there, but I really liked it, and genuinely considered/am considering becoming a member of the RHS.



• I don't think I got into perfume this year - I'm pretty sure that was from displays for last Christmas - but I really continued my interest in it. I discovered Penhaligons early on in the year, and Much Ado About the Duke, which if I ever get the nerve up to buy it, I think will be one of my favourite perfumes ever. And I discovered a bunch of places in Leeds where you can go test the perfumes they often sell online without samples - like Maison de Dior - and that was really helpful. Things got harder after it became more difficult to go out to shops to smell perfume, but I'm looking forward to taking advantage of the resources in years to come. And just this week, I found that a perfume I'd been interested in was on sale, and I could get it at a price I was comfortable paying for something I'd never smelt, so I count this as a success.



• I reorganised at least part of my bedroom. I bought my beautiful chair, which I love, and got rid of my desk and learned to do without that extra surface space. I'm extremely happy I did that as well.



• And bought the cool music centre, and got given all my dad's old vinyl records. I'm annoyed by the clicking of the CD player, but given the state of things I think I'm going to learn to live with it. And it doesn't make CDs unbearable.



• I finished going through my CDs, for which ones I wanted to get rid of! Calloo callay. That was a job that was 'to do' for a few years now. I kept probably too many, but at least no longer have any CDs I've never listened to and am not sure I'm that interested in. Now I have either listened to them, or I am definitely interested in them despite never having listened to them. And I'm glad to have the job done with.



• I discovered that Chester Zoo do 'one-on-one experiences' with the spotted hyenas they have there. I'm also very excited to do that when I next get the chance.



• And then! It turned out that there were spotted hyenas at Yorkshire Wildlife Park, which is about half an hour's drive from me! And they had babies! Which are very rare for hyenas in captivity. I assume my love made it happen.



• I got to see Blu Cantrell in concert. And Salt'n'Pepa, and Shaggy, and Nelly. It was a pretty cool night.



• I started going on more walks with the dog and mum. The dog in general is getting more walks than he's ever gotten. He's started to look for if I have socks on whenever I come down the stairs, and when I do have them on he starts twirling around. We also learned that we can let him off the lead, sometimes, if there are no distractions around, and he will come back and let us put it back on him when we're done. And sometimes he even listens to us while he's off the lead. Our bonding is up about 500% from where it was last year.



• Mum and I saw rabbits very regularly in a particular field near us, to the point that I started calling them Fiver and Hazel. I saw a skylark flying over the field once, singing. I've seen goldfinches and great tits in the wild, near us, which I previously only did on random trips through the countryside, and at bird sanctuaries. Once we saw the tail of a fox, plain as day, down one of the paths we used to walk down. I've seen sparrowhawks fluttering over the fields we walk past, a heron in a stream after the council cleared the brambles away from it, I'm pretty sure I saw a merlin resting on a pylon briefly, and last week I'm fairly certain we saw the sparrowhawk resting in a tree along our usual path, and then a buzzard flying overhead hunting pigeons. Our dog found a frog in a field, far away from any water hole I know about. We found a baby mouse on a path, and shielded it from the blazing summer sunshine that seemed to be blinding it, until it could get to the grass at the side of the path.



• Here are the plants I've started loving over this year: tufted vetch, forget-me-nots, pink and white -striped field bindweed, field scabious, aster, toadflax, hawthorn in the winter and autumn. I learned that the garden flower I love that drapes over people's walls is wisteria. Add to poppies, and wild roses, and bluebells, and foxgloves, which I already loved. I saw a field full of I think lupins in the summer, and it was like looking into another world.



• I love jewellery. Got into the wonderful world of just gemstone jewellery on Etsy. Bought some. Maybe too much. Re-confirmed my love of amazonite and garnet, and padparadscha sapphires. Discovered grandidierite, tanzanite, bumblebee jasper, poppy jasper, Montana sapphire, and apatite. Among many others.



• Ghost of Tsushima came out. It was a pretty good video game. I shipped people in it. Assassin's Creed: Valhalla came out. It is a pretty good video game. I shipped people in it.



• Sony gave me the kind of superlative media experiences I only really experience from them, in the form of the Playstation 5 Reveal Event in June, and the Playstation 5 Showcase in September. Both made me feel like I wanted to jump out of my chair, particularly the June one. To anyone who is not a huge Playsation fan, the constant symbols may look a bit culty, and it is, but if you're in the cult it's overwhelming.



• The Playstation 5 released, despite fears production would be compromised. And it is great, despite people's fears that it wouldn't be. And I got one, which not everyone can say. I love my local games shop, very very much.



• I restarted and finished Project Zero 5: Maiden of Black Water, a game I bought and first started 5 years ago. The only Project Zero game I've managed to actually play. It was good. I'm glad I finished it. The ending was beautiful, in that bittersweet way that Project Zero games have. There were pretty people in it, and I shipped people in it.



• This has gone past midnight. Whoops.



• We had Women's Month, in August. I didn't do everything I intended to do personally that month, but I was pretty proud of what I did do.



• One thing I did do, personally, was rewatch the 2016 Ghostbusters film. I love that film. It was a great film. I love Kirsten Wiig.



• Recent Youtube recommendations also led me to SNL's The Californians. I love Kirsten Wiig, and apparently also that man who plays Stuart.



• And the woman who plays the maid.



• I discovered how marvellous Paul McCartney is.



• Georgia turned blue. Never forget.



• Chadwick Boseman died, and that was really sad, but I found myself incredibly touched by the story of his last few years. As someone with OCD and hypochondria, and a distinct fear of dying of cancer, I honestly couldn't imagine anything but despair, and the last few years of your life ruined if you got a cancer diagnosis. But Chadwick Boseman just kept on working, and didn't tell anyone, and did beautiful, light-hearted human work. I'm not a fan of the Marvel films, but Black Panther was one of the ones I did enjoy and would call a good film, and a lot of it's because of T'Challa and his story. The idea that you could just carry on, and do good work, and develop friendships and be good friends with people even while dying - never seemed that real to me before Chadwick Boseman died. And now it does.



• I got into wrestling early into the year. I sort of fell out of it after they started putting on shows without crowds - maybe because there were no crowds, or maybe just naturally - but I really did enjoy it and intend to get back into it at some point. That was a nice new thing.



• I think I also started watching Kritter Klub this year, a channel about animals and animal rescues in South Korea. Some of their videos are a hard watch - I don't think they have animal cruelty laws for strays in South Korea - but some of them are so lovely, and it's become a go-to channel for me throughout the year. I learned about wonderful, terrible cross-breeds of dogs, like maltese and husky, and retriever and whatever that small dog is (turn on CCs for the full stories). Nature is magical. I also started watching The Dodo regularly. Some of their videos are a bit twee, but some are also really lovely. I recommend Possum surprise in a cupboard.

I don't really believe in being like "fuck 2020, and good riddance!", because I feel like for the past few years everyone's been like "thank god that year's over, bring on the next one!". And now this. We really don't know what's coming in 2021. But here is hoping for more good things.

It's December already and I can't post in daylight, so here's my post now.

It's December already. That's fine, but I keep forgetting/trying not to think about the fact all Christmas shopping has to be done online this year, and all deliveries are delayed and messed up because of the pandemic, so I really need to get on with my online Christmas shopping and I haven't. To be fair, I also want to buy things for me to enjoy for Christmas, and things I need, and it adds up to an amount of money I'm nervous about spending when I don't have a job and um...jobs may not be forthcoming in the near future of the economy. But I did end up with about £2,500 after my last two paycheques and redundancy payments, as well as savings in an ISA, so I know that as long as I don't buy everyone Cartier diamonds for Christmas I will probably be fine. And should just buy things so that they arrive, and in good time to quarantine them. I have already ordered a winter coat, winter boots, presents for the cat and dog and part of my parents' presents. Just need to do the rest.

It is weird knowing we almost certainly won't see the kids this Christmas. Last year was weird, but my dad and I did drive down to see my MN (mum was working), and my YN and ON lived close enough to visit (along with my sister) on Boxing Day. This year, with the restrictions and mum and dad's vulnerable age group, none of that will be happening. In a way, given all the drama, that is quite freeing, but also a bit...empty. But we will call them at least. And I am going to get and send stuff over for them. It's just going to be weird.

( Assassin's Creed Valhalla, spoilers to the middle of the story I think )

I have also been enjoying the current series of I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here, which is mostly just a set of people who are nice really getting on and enjoying each other. But then the British public soured that by getting rid of almost all the women, and keeping almost all the men. I love Giovanna and hope she wins, but it's a bit sad that she's going to have to have a man in the room to pump the water for her whenever she takes a shower now. And then Shane Ritchie will probably win or something.

I give you the gift of animal bloopers from American news. Having pets is wild. My favourite is 1:22 because I'm a child. And then after everything, 13:30.

Playstation 5 all set up, PS3 and 4 relegated to a bed in a spare bedroom, wiped down the games and installed Valhalla. I decided to do it without setting up my internet first, because a lot of people these days on game podcasts like to claim there's no such thing as installing games from a disc anymore, a disc is just an activation device to download it from the internet. And one of my nephews wants a PS5, and is saving up money for it, but the place he's currently in doesn't give him individual internet, so I wanted to see if it was true, and so there was no point in him getting a console. I loaded up the Valhalla disc with no wired connection and no password for our wireless hub, and it copied it from a disc and let me start playing it. So I have no idea what those people - video game sort-of experts - are talking about.

Then, afterwards, I set up the internet and tried to log into my Playstation account. But it has two-step verification, so after logging in they send a code to your phone and you have to wait and input that. I waited about 15 minutes for my code, turned it off and on again and tried again, and got nothing. Then when I finally gave up in frustration and turned it off, I got about five texts with verification codes at once. So that was annoying. But hopefully a problem that will be easily sorted out tomorrow.

I have my PS5. I've wiped it down. I've got some games too, but I can deal with them later. I've not installed it yet. The size of the box suggests to me that I really won't be able to keep all the consoles I currently have in the console spot on there, so I'll have to decide what to do about them. But I have to set it up first. Yay.

Half past 12 in the morning, and I'm trying to get anything on Youtube to load so I can watch the videos I usually do before I go to bed. On the one hand, everything but Youtube is loading fine, so I feel like maybe it's Youtube - experiencing a lot of traffic on this Playstation 5-eve. On the other hand, my game of the Sims (heavily reliant on the internet) froze and crashed twice tonight, so maybe it's not? Either way, I have the whirling circles of death.

I have everything to say and nothing to say. The American election happened, and it happened slowly, and mostly I just didn't understand enough about it to be relieved by anything that happened, but now I am somewhat relieved. To be honest though, I got quite a lot of relief on the morning after the election when it wasn't just a wild landslide for Trump. But it's a little sad that it was still as close as it was.

Like I say, the PS5 is out tomorrow - in America, and a few other countries, so that's probably when I'll have to swear off the internet until it comes out in this country, next Thursday. So far I am on track to pick it up, in a click-and-collect, one-in-one-out fashion, with help from one of my parents and their car. I don't know what the queueing situation will be like, but I assume my little local shop won't have hundreds of units, so not too bad. Then will come the wiping down, once we get it home. I'm not looking forward to that.

I have been getting texts from B&Q about an order I made, except I never made an order, and don't have much to do with B&Q. I tried to call them yesterday, and spent 24 minutes listening to their extremely annoying hold music with adverts embedded, and then my phone handset died. So I gave up. I checked my bank balance and no payments have gone out to B&Q, so I think it's just a mistaken phone number rather than fraud, but I still feel like I want to tell them about it, but they don't make it easy. I should just send them an email,. but who knows when those get read during a lockdown. Heck off B&Q. Your customers don't know when their orders will be delivered. Unless you are also sending emails as well as texts.

I think I'm about to lose my mind trying to catch a walking stick in Animal Crossing.