(no subject)
Jul. 29th, 2015 03:40 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
girlofpreySo now I can go on holiday. My mum told my sister yesterday that I'd said she could go in my place, and then my sister said actually she had an appointment with her drugs service on Monday, and she'd need to talk to them anyway because her methadone prescription was Thursday to Thursday, so if she couldn't get one for the full week she was away she couldn't go. She said something about trying to get in 'before the end of the week'. My mum saw her today and said she needed to make a decision, because it wasn't fair on me to not know if I was going or not (a conversation we had yesterday), and my sister said never mind, I could go. She apparently has a lot to do at home, and it's complicated, so she should really get on with it. My mum suspected my sister only asked to come because she was drunk and upset, and apparently she was right.
Except now I don't know again. I was on the fence about it, and only said I'd go to sort of give it a whirl, and try to build up some enthusiasm this week before going. And now this has thrown me for six, worrying about my sister and constantly going back and forth about whether I'll be here next week or not. Ugh. I still - I'll still feel bad for my YN if I don't go, basically. But I'm feeling completely indifferent to the actual holiday again. Would rather stay home and play on my PS Vita. And I just got my period yesterday (a week late, but better late than never), and I'll have to shave my legs if I want to go swimming, and - UGH.
Except now I don't know again. I was on the fence about it, and only said I'd go to sort of give it a whirl, and try to build up some enthusiasm this week before going. And now this has thrown me for six, worrying about my sister and constantly going back and forth about whether I'll be here next week or not. Ugh. I still - I'll still feel bad for my YN if I don't go, basically. But I'm feeling completely indifferent to the actual holiday again. Would rather stay home and play on my PS Vita. And I just got my period yesterday (a week late, but better late than never), and I'll have to shave my legs if I want to go swimming, and - UGH.
