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I finished Portal 2 last night. Given how much everyone talks about the first game being short, I was expecting it to last longer. But it was good. GLaDOS <3. Chell <3. My main suprise was finding out - through accidentally nearly spoilering myself - that Vern Schillinger from Oz was in it. That was an odd moment. But largely, now I know where a bunch of quotes come from. And from early on I was slashing Chell and GLaDOS. I FEEL LIKE I WAS RIGHT TO DO SO.

Also I am playing Borderlands. I was put off at first because I thought it was just a multiplayer game, and then when I found out it had singleplayer mode, I was put off because the only female "character"/class you could play was called a 'Siren'. But it did still look fun, and everyone talks about it, so I decided to give it a go anyway. And as it turns out, the only female class you can play is indeed called a Siren - whose default name is Lilith - and her special skills involve magical teleportation and elemental attacks. And her combat style, according the game, is "trickery and deception". Also, she's waif-thin. The other - male - characters all have skills like long-range weapons or hand-to-hand combat, and as far as I can tell, none of them have magical powers. And it's annoying, because the magical stuff and the elemental attacks are all really fun to play, actually, and I'm even getting used to her high-pitched laugh whenever she makes a critical hit. But yeah. I'd probably be happier if they'd decided to make the sexy magial liar a male character. Or given ANY of those traits to one of the male characters. Or given you a female choice other than the Siren. But they didn't. But like I say, it is still pretty fun, and the graphics are amazing. I like guns, as it turns out. You should just trust me when I say I have saved you from MANY POSTS on my love of guns in videogames before. But suffice it to say, Borderlands massively caters to this love. Time will tell if that wears thin in the end.

A game I am genuinely suprised by though, which I am also playing, is Mercenaries 2. On the face of it, it's all about blowing things up, and it's also sort of designed to be a multiplayer game. But I looked it up and found out that of the three characters you can play, one is a woman, and you get the same storyline no matter who you choose. And not only is she female, I'm pretty sure she's Asian - she's obviously British, but her name's Jennifer Mui - so she's a female character of colour, and they seem to have made an effort to give her a proper personality. And a bunch of the supporting characters are female - her support operative she starts with is female, and over the course of the game you get three extra members of the team, and one's a female mechanic. And both of the Factions I'm in contact with so far, an oil company and a guerrilla army, are both run by women. And all three of the villain characters are male (so far). There is the fairly problematic fact that it's set in war-torn Venezuela and you get to blow pretty much everything up - because hey, Venezuela's always war-torn, and blowing up other countries' buildings is fun - but largely, I'm pretty impressed with how they're handling a lot of stuff so far. For a multiplayer game that's essentially about blowing things up.
girlofprey: (Default)
Benefits and mental health stuff )

I've been feeling really wiped out and weird over the past few days, and I don't know if it's because of the stress over the appeal, being on my period, or what. I'm feeling in a sort of a fannish limbo as well, because all my shows - or my show, rather - has finished, and obviously Bioshock fandom ended up being a bit of a letdown, after putting off reading half of it for a bit. I'm still feeling weirdly dissatisfied with Bioshock, anyway, and Dishonored, and I can't tell if it's because I genuinely found their endings sort of empty, or because I want to play through again as a baddy to get the other endings, and feel like I'm really done with the canon. Hmm. I'm not playing either. I'm playing Portal 2. GLaDOS is mean.

What I really feel like doing is watching all of old Dallas. I'm not entirely convinced I would be able to do that, however, or to do it in a timely fashion.

Also, it's pre-Christmas, and my mum has started asking me what I want already. And I have genuinely no idea, nor is anything coming to me. Which is a little weird. Last year I just had 3 things I wanted, but I genuinely wanted them, you know? Although last year was pretty easy, because Skyrim was coming out. But this year, nothing really. I mean, there's things I want, but I don't know how mum or dad would react to me being all "Get me 2 cushions from Jon Burgerman". The only thing I can think of is an XBox, just because it's a big thing, but I only really want that so I can play a couple of XBox exclusive games, and possibly some other XBox exclusive games in the future, but I could get those for the PC most of the time. And we'd need to find somewhere to put it. I still haven't plugged in or tested out the Playstation 2 I bought a few months ago. Hmph. Well, I'm sure something will come to me.

I've got my first counselling appointment with my new counsellor tomorrow, which I'm hoping will do something for my mental state, and coping with the appeal and all. Or in the next few weeks, anyway, after we've settled in. I hope I get along with her, as well as I did with my old counsellor. Fingers crossed.
girlofprey: (Default)
I just wrote out my appeal form. They give you the tiniest space to write your reasons why you don't agree with their decision. Which is largely how I felt about the assessment form - although apparently I was some good at filling that in this time. Maybe I just feel like I have A LOT OF REASONS to give them. But I think I got at least some relevant points through, and it's completed now at least. Now I just need to send it out so it will get to Barnsley before Monday. Sigh.

I also caught up with Dallas yesterday, and then watched the final episode. Dallas )

The new series apparently begins in America in January. So obviously I either need to get downloading, or really enjoy these few months of being all caught up before I lose them again.

We also had the American election this week. I am happy and genuinely a little bit amazed that Obama won. As well as all the 'shenanigans' I'd been hearing about, things sort of came to a head on Tuesday night when I started seeing posts on Tumblr about how people were taking pictures of their pro-Obama ballots and posting them online because they were so excited, but that they shouldn't do that, because they could be arrested and have their votes annulled. I was ready to give up, get ready for Romney to win, and be all "2012, End Of Days". But then Obama won. And apparently it wasn't even close. So hurrah.

I also finished Portal, and bought Portal 2. I liked the song at the end. A LOT. And while I was looking for Portal 2 (in vain) in my home town, I found out that the little games shop I used to see when I was a teenager was still open, and both stocking and selling Bioshock action figures! It was a good day all around.

And we had my YN over at my house today. He is sweet, and can pull himself up on furniture, and make lots of noises now. And point. At one point he looked up at one of our houseplants, pointed at it and went "Aaah!", and then went back to playing with his cars. He plays with cars by pushing them along and going "aaaaaaah" or "grrrrrrrrr". He is lovely. I also learned that my mum thinks he's "weird". Which, in fairness, is something I would expect a sitcom granny to say about their baby grandchild, so at least we're living up to the stereotype, thanks mum.

And I saw a bit of Emmerdale today with Declan in it, and it gave me Declan/Nathan feelings. Sigh.

And I had a dentist appointment today, which went quite well, with quite a lovely new lady dentist. It was her first day apparently. She didn't make any mistakes which could only be covered up by saying "It's my first day!". Yay. And we had Bonfire Night, which means we're now in the period of time I officially recognise as Pre-Christmas. Argh. And...something. I'm on my period, and I'm really tired. Oh, and I attempted to buy trousers from H&M, and I found out that of all the weird sizing issues there are from shop to shop, H&M might just take the cake for 'obviously a lot smaller than the number would imply'. And yet I also tried a jumper from there, and the Large was too big for me so I had to get a Medium. Weird.
girlofprey: (Default)
And then I finished Bioshock 2. Which was also good, but...sort of unsatisfactory too. I don't know. I don't think I like karma systems in games. I mean, it's interesting, and it means you have more choice and it adds to replay value, obviously. But I just think at the moment the way games are set up it just messes with the writing - because in almost every one I've played with a karma system, the karma things you do - which WOULD be a big deal, and worth mentioning between well-written characters with well-written relationships - just don't get mentioned until the end, or mentioned in a barely passing way at the end of each quest. In Dishonoured you regularly just got a note from someone, even someone you shared housing with, if you did something nice, and a bit of extra gold. And in both Dishonoured and Bioshock 2, you got sidequests and extra characters who showed up and seemed important for karma choices, and then just never showed up again - because the writers couldn't include them in the later plot in case you'd killed them or let them die. Bioshock 2 probably did the karma thing better than most games, because from the things that got said I'm guessing a lot of the ending was different depending on which choices you'd made. But the main place I saw it done well really was in Fallout 3. Which is a role-playing game, where the point is that you get to choose who your character is, and you don't tend to have lots of involved converstations with the same characters. I don't know, I just feel like a lot of games are swinging towards that role-playing element so players feel more like they're playing the kind of character they want to play, rather than having specific, well-defined characters the players have to play, which is also a pretty good way to write (and play) videogames.

Also, in Bioshock 2 and Dishonoured, I have just played two games where the main character was male, and the main NPC female character was either a child or very much in a child position, whose personalities were massively influenced or completely defined by the choices their fathers/father figures made. Which was nice.

Anyway. I am kind of in a video game limbo state at the moment. I don't really know what to do with myself. My head says buy more video games. Or finish some of the ones I've already started. I started playing the first Portal game today. And, as far as I can tell, have nearly finished it. It is wicked. I can probably pick the second one up sometime this week if I finish it. Which will probably help with the limbo state thing. Also I kind of really want to play this game. Even though it looks disturbing as fuck. Maybe BECAUSE it looks disturbing as fuck.

Of course, a different part of my brain says maybe I should use this time to do some of the other things I kind of need to do. While I was on holiday the disability advisor woman from the Jobcentre called and asked me to call her back as soon as possible, which meant calling from Crete to basically say I couldn't talk to her. I tried calling back last week, and they said she was away, but had scheduled a telephone interview with me tomorrow at 11:10am. So that's happening tomorrow. I have no idea what she's going to say - it might be very short if I just have to tell her I've been kicked off ESA and am appealing, and she can't offer me any services in the meantime. I don't remember them calling me in or giving me a disability advisor the last time I appealed. So we'll see, I guess.

Also I need to fill in my appeal form. I need to fill it in and possibly have it back to them by next Monday. But I don't really know what to say. EVERYTHING'S WRONG, EXCEPT I'M A LITTLE BETTER THAN LAST YEAR, EXCEPT I DON'T THINK I'M READY TO WORK YET. Really. For some reason I've gotten stuck on the idea that they might not pay me if my form isn't good enough or convincing enough, which is probably not true, but still. And I can't really remember what I put on my last appeal form. Hmm.

Also it's my dad's birthday tomorrow. Also I need to organise that volunteering I've been meaning to do, and had to not go to in October. Also I need to catch up on Dallas. Since I'm pretty sure it's the last episode this week. And I have an appointment with my employment coach and with the dentist this week. It's a pretty full week really, all told.
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