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Aug. 10th, 2020
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Aug. 10th, 2020 03:31 pmWell, I called my GP clinic today to ask for a repeat prescription, only to be asked the dreaded question 'do you have access to the internet?'. Apparently they're not doing them over the phone anymore, or only very reluctantly. The woman took my details and said she'd said everything up for me and would send details to my mobile. Six text messages later, I had a password and username, and a bunch of other stuff I can't use or confirm because I don't have a smartphone. I did a virus scan, as I always do, before doing anything personal or entering any personal information into a website. Only to discover I can't get my anti-depressants anymore without a review from the doctor. Which I'll have to call the doctor's to arrange. Amazing.
Women's Month - Day ten
Aug. 10th, 2020 10:36 pmPrincess Olga of Kiev
I would like to talk to you all about my favourite historical figure: Princess Olga of Kiev. Now, I've heard a few different versions of this story, but I don't really think it matters, for reasons I'll discuss at the end.
Princess Olga was a noblewoman in Kiev, which is a city in Ukraine, back in the time when most of that area was city-states, Kiev included. The king of Kiev married Olga and she became the queen (although apparently kept being referred to as a princess), and they had a son together. However, at the same time Kiev was at war with it's neighbouring city-state. The king went to fight in the war, and was killed. The king of the neighbouring city-state then wrote to Olga, saying basically "your king is dead, and you have no hope of winning the war, marry me and we can merge our two kingdoms, otherwise I'll destroy you". Princess Olga wrote back to the king agreeing, and asked him to send his finest warriors to Kiev as emissaries, to arrange the wedding. When the warriors arrived, Princess Olga put on a feast for them after their long journey, and then when they had eaten a bunch and gotten really drunk, she turned to her servants and said "kill them". Which they did.
The king of the neighbouring city-state found out about this and wrote Princess Olga another letter, saying he was not kidding around, if she didn't marry him he'd kill her and all her people. So she wrote back that she was sorry, and yes, marrying him was clearly the best thing to do. And she asked him to send his wisest men, as emissaries, to Kiev to plan the wedding.
The wisest men - probably very reluctantly, if they were wise at all - went to Kiev, and when they arrived Princess Olga said they must be tired after their long journey, and offered them the use of a sauna to rest in and recover. They agreed and went inside, and when they'd gone inside, Princess Olga had her servants lock the door, and burn the sauna down.
So at this point the neighbouring city-state started to panic. They'd now lost their best warriors and their best generals/councillors, which put them in a worse state than Kiev's army even though Kiev had lost their king. They started begging Princess Olga for mercy and offering her furs, honey, all the most valuable things they had at that time, in exchange for peace. Princess Olga agreed, and asked for three sandmartins from every household in the city as her tribute. Sandmartins were (and are) little birds that like to nest under the eaves of houses, so there were plenty around in a city, and everyone was grateful that she asked for so little in return for peace. So everyone in the neighbouring city-state went into their attics, caught a few sandmartins each, put them into cages, and happily sent them off to Kiev. Whereupon Princess Olga had her servants take all the birds out of the cages, tie little bags of gunpowder or pitch to their legs, and let them go again. When the birds were released, they immediately flew back to their homes and nests, under the eaves of the houses in the neighbouring city. And then Princess Olga marched her army to the neighbouring city, and told them to burn it down, which was extremely simple, because now all the rooves were filled with gunpowder. In this way, Princess Olga protected her city and her throne, and kept it safe for her son until he grew old enough to rule.
Now there's a lot of evidence that this story isn't entirely true, or very true at all. For example, there were apparently no roof-nesting birds in that part of the world during the time Princess Olga lived. But I strongly doubt that all the stories about any famous historical figure are true, and it's a good story all the same. Also Princess Olga of Kiev was definitely real, and I recently found out she's actually a Christian saint - because while she ruled she became really interested in Christianity and converted, and was responsible for pushing the Christian religion a great deal in that part of the world, and converting the population to it. Which is amazing, because I mostly knew her as a murderer. But apparently she was canonised and is now considered on par with St Peter, which is pretty high up really. Also: "burn it down".
I would like to talk to you all about my favourite historical figure: Princess Olga of Kiev. Now, I've heard a few different versions of this story, but I don't really think it matters, for reasons I'll discuss at the end.
Princess Olga was a noblewoman in Kiev, which is a city in Ukraine, back in the time when most of that area was city-states, Kiev included. The king of Kiev married Olga and she became the queen (although apparently kept being referred to as a princess), and they had a son together. However, at the same time Kiev was at war with it's neighbouring city-state. The king went to fight in the war, and was killed. The king of the neighbouring city-state then wrote to Olga, saying basically "your king is dead, and you have no hope of winning the war, marry me and we can merge our two kingdoms, otherwise I'll destroy you". Princess Olga wrote back to the king agreeing, and asked him to send his finest warriors to Kiev as emissaries, to arrange the wedding. When the warriors arrived, Princess Olga put on a feast for them after their long journey, and then when they had eaten a bunch and gotten really drunk, she turned to her servants and said "kill them". Which they did.
The king of the neighbouring city-state found out about this and wrote Princess Olga another letter, saying he was not kidding around, if she didn't marry him he'd kill her and all her people. So she wrote back that she was sorry, and yes, marrying him was clearly the best thing to do. And she asked him to send his wisest men, as emissaries, to Kiev to plan the wedding.
The wisest men - probably very reluctantly, if they were wise at all - went to Kiev, and when they arrived Princess Olga said they must be tired after their long journey, and offered them the use of a sauna to rest in and recover. They agreed and went inside, and when they'd gone inside, Princess Olga had her servants lock the door, and burn the sauna down.
So at this point the neighbouring city-state started to panic. They'd now lost their best warriors and their best generals/councillors, which put them in a worse state than Kiev's army even though Kiev had lost their king. They started begging Princess Olga for mercy and offering her furs, honey, all the most valuable things they had at that time, in exchange for peace. Princess Olga agreed, and asked for three sandmartins from every household in the city as her tribute. Sandmartins were (and are) little birds that like to nest under the eaves of houses, so there were plenty around in a city, and everyone was grateful that she asked for so little in return for peace. So everyone in the neighbouring city-state went into their attics, caught a few sandmartins each, put them into cages, and happily sent them off to Kiev. Whereupon Princess Olga had her servants take all the birds out of the cages, tie little bags of gunpowder or pitch to their legs, and let them go again. When the birds were released, they immediately flew back to their homes and nests, under the eaves of the houses in the neighbouring city. And then Princess Olga marched her army to the neighbouring city, and told them to burn it down, which was extremely simple, because now all the rooves were filled with gunpowder. In this way, Princess Olga protected her city and her throne, and kept it safe for her son until he grew old enough to rule.
Now there's a lot of evidence that this story isn't entirely true, or very true at all. For example, there were apparently no roof-nesting birds in that part of the world during the time Princess Olga lived. But I strongly doubt that all the stories about any famous historical figure are true, and it's a good story all the same. Also Princess Olga of Kiev was definitely real, and I recently found out she's actually a Christian saint - because while she ruled she became really interested in Christianity and converted, and was responsible for pushing the Christian religion a great deal in that part of the world, and converting the population to it. Which is amazing, because I mostly knew her as a murderer. But apparently she was canonised and is now considered on par with St Peter, which is pretty high up really. Also: "burn it down".