girlofprey | (no subject)

I had a lot of plans for today. I was going to try to watch Jaws, having gotten a hankering for it (fandom finally caught up and wrote slash, <3). But I don't have any way to get it except through my Playstation really - I'm not going to use Amazon - and apparently it was on Netflix, but got removed on the 11th of this month. And also my internet's stopped working reliably on the Playstation, so I can't even get it from the Playstation Store.

Also I was going to put my brand new duvet set that I got at Christmas on my bed, to freshen it up, and I was going to put it on alongside clean sheets one night after I had a shower. I've had a shower, but it turns out that after a previous fitted sheet for my bed had to be thrown away we never got a new one, so there are literally no clean sheets to put on bed. So I can't. Or I can, but I'll be uncomfortable.

Sad times.

But I had plenty of other plans I carried out, so it's not all bad.

Last night my mum rubbed Dettol on the dog's head after I got a pizza delivery and he arrived unfortunately at the same time as the dog was out in the garden, and the delivery guy may or may not have patted him on the head. So mum disinfected that head. The dog was very good about it. But it's possible we're going a bit too far with our Coronavirus-avoidance.

In terms of how I'm doing, I'm mostly torn between buying every ridiculous thing I want online just to cheer myself up and make lockdown life a bit more interesting, and selling all my belongings and my hair and donating all the money to people who are struggling at the moment. It's difficult to know what the best thing to do is. Or what the future's going to look like. I'm still seeing people talking about making lists of all the restaurants they're going to eat at when lockdown's over, and positivity is important, but it's still sort of like 1) if those restaurants haven't gone out of business, 2) if you can even get a table, given that everyone is probably going to feel the same way, and now 3) if we're really allowed in restaurants even after we're out of lockdown, or they still want us to social distance more than that.

But I've discovered some shops in Leeds that sell some of the online perfume I've been seeing, so I'm planning to go to them when shops and leaving the house are a thing again. Unless they've gone bankrupt. But you do make plans, and there's no reason not to unless you actually see some evidence you can't do it.

This may be one of the funniest tweets I've ever seen. Also I'm very glad I don't wear make-up.

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I feel sick with how much make up she put on her face.

I am also doing the thing where I just want to buy things, but then I want to never buy anything again because we shouldn't have things, we should have health care and communities and simpler ways of doing everything, and my brain hurts. And then later when I'm less in my head I just buy things.

People touch Rita sometimes and I think it's okay and I know it doesn't last long on fabric and dogs are practically fabric and I do not dettol her, but it is a funny thing. She wants so much to be loved that I can't very well stop them.

Yeah. In the full video, she said it was her 'extra af' make-up, so I assume it's not the amount she wears on an average day, but still, it's crazy. Like, where's your skin under all that? How long does it take you? Rather than just going out with your face. And then the contouring, to literally make it look like you have a different, better face. Your face is fine. I think I would feel claustrophobic under all that powder and paste, though.

The shopping thing is very odd for me, in a completely mad way, because I'm still obsessed with Far Cry 5 and Joseph Seed, and his whole thing was that the modern world had an addiction to stuff, and we should just live more simply and off the land, and maybe it was okay to get rid of computers if it meant we also cared more and got rid of homelessness. So I have a fictional psychopath in my ear constantly guilt-tripping me too. And I do believe we should have simpler lives and better public services, and obviously fast fashion and consumerism and stuff are hellish for the environment too. But I also think we should have art, and I think the state should support art given it's proven benefits, and if they're not going to do that then maybe it's okay for me to buy a few Etsy prints. And a random ornament. I'm sure even cavepeople picked up pretty rocks sometimes, and painted on the walls. Life can't only be 'necessary'. But then it's just really awkward at the moment because of the added risks - to other people - and having a bunch of deliveries. And the fact I don't think our government will support us in having better public services, and our country isn't going to support us to have a better government, so maybe I can get that weird cherry bowl I don't need. It's a tough struggle. I'm hoping we'll all have more general conversations about this when the pandemic is a bit more under control.

There's just so much random information around, and new things coming out every day, it's hard to know what to risk. It's very like that story you once told me about the vaccination supporter who once nearly refused to have her baby vaccinated, because throughout her pregnancy whenever she wanted to take or eat almost anything the message was basically 'okay, but your baby might die'. If it was just me I think I wouldn't bother and would let more things go, but knowing my mum is in the house and is in that slightly more vulnerable group just makes me...not. And the fact she's worrying so much and doing so much makes me not want to ruin her work. But the dogs are all so sad when no-one pets them at the moment, I think they must all assume we have amnesia and have forgotten them. It's very fraught.

SO CLAUSTROPHOBIC oh my god yes.

I don't think our government will support us in having better public services, and our country isn't going to support us to have a better government, so maybe I can get that weird cherry bowl I don't need

In many ways I think this is the best summation of brain space during this whole thing that there has ever been. But your weird cherry bowl link is the make up tutorial again. I want to see your weird cherry bowl. I googled 'weird cherry bowl' and got pictures of the most ordinary bowls I've ever seen.

And yeah, I think about that vaccination woman so much when I start feeling like literally *everything* is too dangerous, and when all the random information sort of rattles around my head and I literally don't even know what's sensible any more.

A stray link! I linked too hard. Here it is, and according to the description I could use it for other berries. It so ridiculous and yet I want it.

Also Joseph Seed was mad and killed people and thought God spoke directly to him. And was maybe psychic, and interpreting that in a religious way. His 'whole thing' was not just doing better, I am aware of that.

This made me laugh out loud like crazy. I've only seen the first bits of Joseph Seed, I can't remember if you forced me to watch them or if I watched them so I'd know what on earth you were talking about, but the idea of you living through the entire game and thinking his 'whole thing' was just 'doing better' is beautiful.

People are very confused on Tumblr sometimes. (I think you watched a let's play of the opening before we went to the last Eastercon, because the game came out about four days beforehand, and you are very kind.)

Gah, that sucks that your Jaws plans went out the window like that after you'd made them! 0_0;

This post reminds me that I need to clean my sheets at some point, actually. Thank you for that! XD

It's good that there were other plans that you were still able to do though!

Hmm, I could see that about rubbing Dettol on the dog's head--especially if he didn't mind it. You could be going overly-cautious, but you never really know. I still am in the habit of not touching my cats until I've washed my hands whenever I go outside now.

I'm in rather the same situation when it comes to when and where to spend money at that moment, especially since we don't know what the future will bring yet.

It's good that people are trying to be positive, but you're right in that we should also look at things from a realistic angle too. Still, making plans never hurts and if it helps keep your chin up currently...it's something to look forward to doing, at any rate. I hope those shops will be there when you can venture out once more! ♥

Yes, I'm finding it a lot easier to deal with plans that don't go well at the moment, funnily enough. I know there's always another day I can do them, some way.

My cat is an indoor-outdoor cat, so I'm honestly trying not to pet her too much at the moment, which feels awful. I know the risk is pretty small, but I just don't know where she's been when she's out. I'd like to say she's so stand-offish with us I don't think she'd go up to strangers, but she's actually really curious and needy when new people come to the house, and apparently my nephews found out she hangs out at our neighbour's house begging for chicken sometimes. So I really don't know where she's been, and it's hard to want to take the risk. I think we're all worrying more than we usually do at the moment.