girlofprey: (R for raygun)
I went to Fairburn Ings today with my mum and YN, which is our local RSPB reserve. It wasn't as sunny as it had been, but it also wasn't as insanely hot, and it was pretty nice, other than my nephew getting bored and being a little bastard. Also I bought some hedgehog food and have decided to start leaving some out, since we might have some in the area. I've decided not to tell my dad about this until it's established and the hedgehogs expect the food and there's nothing that can be done. Also I bought a bug/bee house, which came with some free wildflower seeds for your garden. I might try to figure out how to put those up also without dad noticing.

I had my ESA assessment the other week. It was late, as usual. They told me when I got in that I might be waiting at least half an hour, and I ended up waiting an hour. They offered me another appointment, and I could have taken it and just gotten paid for another few weeks probably - but I figured why bother, when that appointment would probably be late too, and I don't really want to be stuck in an endless loop. So I bit the bullet and waited for it. It went about how I expected. The lady was a little humourless, and I tried to be as honest as possible when answering the questions, while still making clear the problems I do have. She said it might take a couple of weeks, and I'd be paid until then - I got a call yesterday of somebody telling me the decision, and offering to talk me through it. I got 0 points, as usual, but it's not so bad this time. And certainly not unexpected. And it was nice to get a call I guess, rather than just the report. Happily, I was due a payment yesterday, and the guy said that had gone through, so I got a last payment at least, to tide me over. But I am officially off ESA now. I can appeal, of course, but I won't, I don't even feel like it anymore. So I'm going to need to go on Jobseeker's pretty shortly. Or find a job. Ideally, get a job either way.

I think I'm going to have to leave Tumblr, at least for a little bit. It's a shame because it's where fandom is at the moment, but the way it happens I just feel like I'm having arguments constantly. Without even saying anything. Of course, being in video game fandom feels like that anyway. People are going to need to learn the difference between sex, sexy and sexualised, or I'm going to start screaming. And all the Ghostbusters crap hasn't been fun. On the plus side, we got a great film out of it. On the minus side, every time I think I'm a horrible bitter person who hates the world, something terrible happens and I realise that I'm actually an incredible optimist. Which is to say that terrible things are happening to Leslie Jones at the moment, especially on twitter, because people are cunts. If any of you feel like doing anything to support her, that would probably be much appreciated right now.

Also I stopped playing The Witcher 3 and went back to Fallout 4. I'm so happy.

Emmerdale is swinging back and forth between moments of massive hilarity and extreme annoyance, dotted with the occasional moment of incredible beauty, right now. But on Coronation Street, they might finally make true the fact that David probably has PTSD. I loved Sarah wanting to look after him so much. I just want her to make him lie down on a bed with her, and put her arms round him and kiss his hair. I forget that he's the youngest sometimes.
girlofprey: (R for raygun)
Continuing the clear out of my bedroom, went through my wardrobe today. Got rid of a lot of stuff I was only keeping because it was still in good condition or for sentimental reasons. Or stuff that never really fit, and I only kept it to remind myself I looked nice in it so I should get a bigger version one day. Anyway. Realised I could keep my old leather biker jacket, which is a 14, if I didn't try to zip it up and just wore it like a cardigan. Also managed to get into a size 12 skirt (!) somehow - the button was pulling at the buttonhole, but I could breathe in it, and mum said I should keep it, it looked fine. Don't know if I will - still not sure where I'll wear it and I'm a little concerned about being able to sit down in it, but. It was a surprise nonetheless. Meanwhile a size 12 coat I kept from some reason didn't fit me at all anymore. Whatever, clothes sizes.

The saddest part was probably trying to figure out what to do with my uncle's old leather jacket. He died before I was born - killed himself at 20 - but he and my dad were really close growing up. My sister used to wear the leather jacket around, and after she stopped I took it, even though I never wore it. It's just hanging in the back of my wardrobe now, with one of his old denim shirts. I forgot I had it, and it seems a shame that it's just hanging around doing nothing when it still looks wearable. But it seems a shame to get rid of it too. I asked my dad, and he looked sad, but said yeah I could give it to charity, there was no point hanging on to it. Then my mum suggested we keep it for one of the boys when they grow up, which is a nicer option. Who knows if they'll want it, but black leather jackets never really go out of style. We might box it up and put it in the loft, or something.

Anyway. After that I tried on a couple of hats that are just sitting around my bedroom, just as a formality or last interaction before I gave them away I thought. But then I realised I look pretty good in them. I look like a gangster in the fedora, and an adventurer in the Indiana Jones hat. So now I'm keeping them. I might become a hat person. Mostly I just need to find a place for them where they won't gather dust again.

Here's some happy news: I was reading a Nature magazine yesterday (I get some free because I joined the RSPB), and apparently Deustche Bank (which I assume is an actual bank) are predicting that within 2 years solar power will be so cheap it will be uneconomical for countries to still use conventional sources like fossil fuels. So climate change might have one less thing egging it on. If it's true it makes the current argument about fracking look even more ridiculous, but eh. Fingers crossed.

We had a storm last night (which I suppose is somewhat related), and the crossroads at the end of my street flooded, as it frequently does, and apparently the hospital where my mum works flooded. It's in a bit of a dip behind the town centre, and mum said water was running down the walls from the upper street level entrance. I'm a little worried about the Hospice where I volunteer - they had a terrible flood a few years ago, and they couldn't use a bunch of their rooms until they raised some money and got them refurbished. Their building's also in a dip, and the last time there was a storm you could see where all the water had washed soil from the gardens down to the front entrance, although it didn't flood. Apparently after the big flood they had some new features put in place to stop it happening again, but. We've all heard that before. Fingers crossed, again, I guess.
girlofprey: (Giant Fucking Monsters (Cloverfield m15m)
I saw a story on ITV news yesterday about the 'benefits' of climate change. Financial, obviously. Really, England?

I have also signed up for Netflix - I'm not having a great time downloading stuff anymore, and it's pretty cheap at £7 a month really and I get it streamed straight to my PS4. I'm on my free month at the moment, and I've already watched all of The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, which I enjoyed thoroughly. So it's working out pretty well so far!

Also I have been going through some of my old notebooks, trying to collect all my original story ideas into one place in case I want them later on. It's a weird little trip through memory lane - from the to do lists I had when I lived in Nottingham to the angsty stuff I wrote about my family in University. Surprisingly little has been unbearably embarrassing though - I've only had to destroy a couple of pages so no-one can ever read them again, including me. Also odd to find all the little snippets I wrote for fics and pairings from years past, which also were way less embarrassing than I figured they'd be. Maybe I really am a good writer. Huh.
girlofprey: (R for raygun)
Mere months after Australia elected a conservative Prime Minister, their government is trying to get rid of some of their ancient forests. Never heard of that before.

Why do fascists hate trees so much?
girlofprey: (R for raygun)
Bayer is trying to sue Europe to overturn the ban on neonicotinoids, mere months after it was passed and a few months before it will actually be enforced. If you feel strongly about this, you go here to sign a petition to tell them to fuck off.

I'm so tired. After a lot of to-ing and fro-ing I eventually got in touch with my worker with my new mental health service, and he came last week for a short visit to arrange our future visits, and then he came today for our first proper visit. I'd mentioned maybe tidying my bedroom, which I was then freaking out a little about, but it turned out I didn't need to worry because today we were just filling in preliminary forms. Also talking about the internet and dance shows, among other things. But between worrying about the appointment and a few OCD issues I haven't had a lot of sleep lately, and he stayed for two hour and we didn't really get anything done besides forms. And I had a knock on the door from a delivery person that I didn't answer, so I need to go pick up a package tomorrow or some time. I think it's either a hat or a book. And at least the Post Office is open till 8pm tomorrow. I've also had a letter from the doctor's about a smear test, so I need to go talk to someone about that. At least I don't have to sort out my doctor's note again - I got a letter saying it hadn't arrived at the Jobcentre, and I called the Jobcentre and they said it STILL hadn't arrived, but yesterday I had more money in my bank account than I did last week, and I can't think of anyone but the Jobcentre who might have done that. So hurrah.

Also I have been replaying an RPG I love, which has been taking up quite a bit of time. It's funny, I know it's sort of cheat-y, but I think I enjoy RPG a little better the second time around on a role-playing level. After you've actually gotten used to the world, and where your character probably came from in it. It's nice, anyway. But time-consuming. And a little sad that I love replaying those games more than I love playing or replaying the sequels to them. Ah well. Also I have been watching TV. I don't know if I like them squashing Coronation Street onto Sundays and Mondays to make way for football, but that's what we all have to put up with. I like the amount of sleeping Joe is doing in this series of Vera. And Touch Of Cloth was genuinely atrocious last week, but this week marginally better. Although it might have just been the relief that it was AS shit as last week. And it ended randomly on a slash pairing. A slash pairing I may have considered in the past. I'm saying nothing. The only time I've ever found Julian Rhind-Tutt particularly attractive. People who have actually watched A Touch Of Cloth will probably know why.

And I've been having some real problems with my internet over the past couple of days. I've been downloading a lot of pictures off Google Search lately, and I found my internet just giving out, dropping the signal every five minutes since then. At first I thought I'd broken my computer or broken my wireless modem somehow. But then I tried clearing my cache, and then I remembered how Google is always banging on about it's cookie policy and cleared my cookies, and now it is fine again! Ah. It's almost like, ten years after getting on the internet, I am finally figuring out how to use my computer. Larks.
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