girlofprey: (R for raygun)
The Clinton-Trump election cycle is just sort of amazing. Also horrifying. But, I would almost start having hope if I didn't remember the way my stomach sank the morning I realised we voted to leave the EU. The responses to all the allegations about Trump are terrifying, though. People genuinely pretending to care about rape survivors that Hillary obviously harassed, but also claiming that all the women accusing Trump must be lying. I don't even know what they think they look like.

My new duvet is still too hot. It seems ridiculous to change it now, when it's getting colder - and was genuinely wintery today - but still not very pleasant. And mum still wants to mess with the mattress some more, which is great, but I really having been sleeping much lately, and all I want to do is play video games, which I can't do on my PS4 if I can't sit on my bed. I don't even know what it is lately. I'm all over the place. I don't know if it's tiredness, or if something's making me tired, or what. It's something that often happens to me when I'm trying to split my focus in too many directions, but I don't know what that could be lately. Except maybe all the appointments I had this week. My plan is to get some sleep and play Fallout 4 until I feel better, at any rate.

I'm also considering whether or not to leave the Hospice. I was looking into other kickboxing classes, since I can't make the Wednesday night one anymore, and Wakefield is the easiest place to get to from Leeds, really. So I was looking if they had any classes on an evening I could get to, and it looks like they might have one on Saturdays. I'll have to call and check it is an actual class, but it looks like it. But it's at 1:45, and I work till 1 at the Hospice, so I couldn't really get there in time from there...and even if I could, I don't know if I really want so much of my weekend taken up when I'm working five days a week. So. I love the Hospice, and I really wanted to stay if I could, but kickboxing does more for me I think, and I've been wanting to do it since I was 15, and I don't really want to give it up. It's just thrown me a little bit. My boss asked me if I'd be leaving them after I got my new job and I said no, but if there's a chance I could carry on with kickboxing...I think I'm gonna have to take it. I'll call tomorrow and see if it really is doable.
girlofprey: (R for raygun)
The holiday is on Friday. I'm feeling a bit better about it - mostly because D from the Hospice called asking me to work that week, and I realised there really were less fun things I could be doing. Apparently our boss is off - she has regular problems with her nerves, and I'm guessing that's the issue since I was being called for a shift two weeks beforehand. Which is probably not making things very easy for D, who was only supposed to be working ad hoc and a couple of shifts a week while the building work was happening. But that's how it is, unfortunately. At least there are no patients in that might be affected by any turmoil. Anyway. I still think, as I realised last week, that my ideal holiday of the moment would be a week away with just me and my parents, or a week here with just me and my parents. Just a nice long time without my nephews coming down or any childcare at all. But like I say - I've realised there were less fun things I could be doing. Also I got really excited to see Suicide Squad, and that's out literally on Friday, and not something I could really take the kids to see as a fun activity while we're away. Well, there's a midnight showing on Thursday. But I don't I'd enjoy what that would do to my sleep schedule. Also there's a good-looking game that everyone's been excited for for months out next Tuesday, so I can't try it out myself and form my own opinions before the internet makes up its mind. But I can wait.

Luckily I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow, to review my medication, which will be a good chance to get it renewed before it runs out next week. Assuming she continues my medication, but I don't see why she wouldn't when it's working really well for me. And then - god it's weird how packed my schedule feels, when there's not really that much in it. I've got the holiday next week, then I'll probably be back at the hospice, then at the end of August we'll be going to Insomnia, a games convention, then it'll be September and my sister's birthday and Back To School. And then it'll be October, when I have two trips with LJ pals lined up. And then it'll be practically Christmas. I guess I'm more amazed at how time flies.

I did finally get on and try to apply for Jobseeker's online. It turns out I can't apply if I've received ESA in the last calendar month. Which is really weird, when the guy who called to tell me about my assessment decision offered to transfer me to the Jobseeker's department there and then. But anyway. I have to wait. Which I discovered after quite a lot of confusing searching. Thanks, government. I guess I can start looking for work though.
girlofprey: (R for raygun)
Had a mildly depressing weekend last week. Three separate people called me by the wrong name on Saturday morning at the Hospice, mistaking me for the permanent receptionist I work with, who's been ill for the past couple of days. Had to explain to one at length that no, I wasn't covering for her, I am in fact there every week. I suppose to be fair I'm usually the only one who works on a weekend apart from her and I finish at Saturday lunchtime, so most of the time if they call they'll be speaking to her. And I am pretty quiet. But still. It was quite a novelty when I called my boss over something and she called me by name.

Also had a series of dreams where I disappointed people last night. Or I had to continually work or live with people who didn't really like me or treat me well - I can't remember exactly. But I'm not really sure where that came from.

I've been wearing a different perfume lately, one I quite like to wear in spring. It's got mint in it, and for a while I was really confused, because it suddenly smelled really familiar, like something I'd smelled in the last few months. Then I realised. It was After Eight mints. I smell like a box of After Eight mints. But slightly nicer, obv.

There's a game out tomorrow that I've been waiting for for a while. I'm getting the Collector's Edition so it's going to be pretty expensive, but it should include a sweet watch. At least I hope it will be a sweet watch. So hopefully it'll be worth it. I'm considering getting these beautiful headphones. Decisions, decisions.

I tried to kill the Wizened Hag today in Darkest Dungeon, and every single character I took with me died. I hate the Wizened Hag.
girlofprey: (R for raygun)
Oh my God I am tired. My week of doing things, doing all the things, while my parents are also away is now at an end. I do need to go out for Sunday lunch tomorrow, but I'm counting that as a treat not a Task. It ended mainly with me being unable to remember basic things all day - I kept forgetting to give people visitors badges at the Hospice today, and then at the supermarket I left my card in the card machine at the till. That was fun. And then this evening I was settling down and trying to eat my tea, when a dude turned up at the door doing market research surveys. I tried to be like "I'm eating my tea", but he said I was the only young person who'd opened the door that evening and it would be lovely to get my perspective. He gave me his ID as soon as I opened the door and a lot of the questions were weird and random - ones about how many holidays I'd taken that year, and then ones about if I had any mental health problems and if I felt I'd suffered any discrimination over it. I was a little concerned it was a scam, but the company's real apparently. So just a legal scam. I accidentally said I'd fill in future surveys because they give you £15 for doing them, and now he has my name, address and telephone number. I'm sure it'll be fine. He did seem perfectly nice. But I might have to cancel those as soon as they come through the post.

But anyway, it's over now. I have nothing else to do until my parents get back, and not even really then because the house will be in such disarray nothing will probably get done for a day or so. I can just sit in and play video games or not play video games because the screens hurt my eyes or whatever. Hurrah. Also, happily, I haven't seen any sign of my sister during this holiday of my parents'. My mum called today, and apparently they're all sick at my sister's house, which is probably limiting their movements. Double yay.
girlofprey: (Futurama Taught Toaster Love)
I have a PS Vita.

After about a week of my nephew assuring me his mum had found it and nothing getting said, my mum asked about it - and my sister said she didn't know where it was. I actually went online and to my local computer game shop asking about replacement chargers (they're pretty hard to get hold of, apparently) - and then the next day my mum turned up with it from my nephew's house. I got some money out today and handed it over to mum, to 'keep hold of it' for my nephew - she's our intermediary in this matter, as I'm sure you can tell. My nephew doesn't seem that excited about selling it anymore, for some reason, but I'm pretty excited to have it. It doesn't seem to hold onto an internet connection well, which means it might be a little difficult to download games - but probably still doable. Now all I must do is buy an extra memory card and put even more money on my Playstation account, and at least a couple of the exclusive games will be mine, hahaha.

I also volunteered today - nearly missed the bus, after dad and I held each other up in the bathroom as we've never done any other Saturday. But I got there in the end. In the handover book this week, the note about calling down for new visitors was scribbled out with what looked like 'knope' written over it - which I can only assume means 'nope'. So I'm going to assume we're not doing that anymore. Unfortunately I had no new visitors to try it out on, and next week the paid receptionist should be starting so I can take new visitors down to the ward personally if they come. Damn.
girlofprey: (R for raygun)
I've got another kickboxing lesson on Monday, and I think I'm going to get my period soon. I just realised I don't really know how to manage that on a regular basis. All the websites suggest that 'moderate' exercise is fine or even helpful during a period, but not to push yourself on really bad days - which is going to be unfortunate if my regular bad days line up with classes too often. I've still got plenty of days that aren't too bad though. I'm a little more concerned about leaking - those same websites suggest tampons rather than pads while you're exercising. I've used a tampon once in my life and it was fine, but not exactly something I look forward to doing again. Hmph. I'll just have to bear it I guess. There must be ways women handle doing kickboxing regularly, there were plenty of women at the class I was at. Plenty of female instructors too. I just hope the gear they're going to give me is dark rather than light - I think it's black actually. And I'll have to see if this month's bad day happens on Monday, and I have to reschedule.

Volunteering's going well, I put my name down to do bank shifts. I'm not sure if that means I'll get a call if they need anyone to cover a spare shift or if I should be checking the book myself though. I'll probably give it a look next week. I did one on Thursday and it is kind of mental how different things are during the week than during the weekend. More people are around to give you a hand though, so eh. The only problem I'm having at the moment is a bit of confusion about what to do with new visitors to the Hospice. The ward's a little way down from reception and I can't leave the desk to take people, so I was told to them to go down the corridor (which they can see from the desk), ignore a desk on the left and keep going till they see the nurses' station on the right, and ask there for someone to help them. Then the first Saturday I was there on my own, one of the nurses - I think she was senior, but I don't know everyone well enough to say for sure - she came up to my desk and said a few new visitors had been wandering round looking lost, so I should probably tell people to take a seat, and call a nurse to come get them. I had actually called the ward to tell them new visitors were coming down and to keep an eye out for them every time new people had come, but I thought whatever, I'll do as I'm asked. The same day I asked people to take a seat and called the ward, and the nurse I spoke to said "Oh, send them down, I'll meet them at the doors".

So I asked the head receptionist about it on Thursday. Apparently telling people to take a seat and calling the nurses was how they used to do things, but then they decided not to, it was too much hassle for the nurses or something. So she told me I shouldn't, I should just send people down. And she said she'd speak to one of the head nurses, and find out why I was told differently. On Saturday I got in, and looked in the Handover Book (where people put notes for new receptionists to see in case there's new information they need to worry about), and there was a note saying that on the weekend, 'until further notice', ask new visitors to take a seat and get a nurse to come down and fetch them. I did that, and whenever I called the nurses were like 'okay, send them down' and I had to explain I had a note telling me to get a nurse to fetch them. Some of the nurses had a little consternation about the whole thing, so I called the Head Receptionist, asked her if the note was right, and she told me it was, because the senior nurses were off work so I should do that until she could sort things out with them. She told me to put her through to the ward and she'd sort it out with the nurses - I did, and she called me back and said everything was fine, they just hadn't been told, and to go ahead with what the note said. Then a nurse came up to my desk, asked me if it had been her who came up to my desk and changed things the first time - it wasn't - and said that from now on, when new visitors came, I should call the ward and see what they say, whether I should send them down or if a nurse is willing to come get them.

So. Great. I have no idea what I'm doing, chopping and changing every five minutes, and I'm left wondering if it's my fault, if I give bad directions so they're having to make exceptions for me. Everyone keeps assuring me it's not, that it's probably just because I'm new and they're trying to make things easier for me until I've settled in. It would make things easier for me if I had a set thing to do and could just do it, and wasn't having to argue with the nurses every five minutes. Hopefully it will get sorted out this week or something. I literally cannot understand why they're suddenly changing things just when I'm on.

But other than that it's great. Super. I spend most of my time on Saturdays looking at game reviews on the computer, and then having to stop that because too many reviews gets a little overwhelming.
girlofprey: (R for raygun)
Today our toilet had a big puddle of liquid at the base of it, on the floor. For a few weeks now I've been noticing an odd damp outline around the bottom of it, where it joins the floor, but my dad insisted it must be condensation - even when there wasn't any on the toilet - because there was no other way water could get out. Today he's saying it was probably because my MN was at our house - he seems to think none of my nephews have the ability to aim. My MN has never done anything like that when he's stayed over before, but the toilet hasn't been leaking since. I am still unconvinced though.

Apart from anything, we're having a problem with the toilet because it's got this tendency to run after you flush it, so you have to jiggle the lid about before the cistern will fill up properly and allow you to flush it again. This has been a problem for at least a year, but this last week it's just been running and running, and no amount of jiggling could reliably fix it. I don't like that stupid toilet. I'm also pretty sure I'm about to start, or have already somewhat started my period, and I don't think that's going to be enjoyable with our main toilet broken.

Also it is Mother's Day tomorrow and my mother has taken off. She will not be up waiting for my card from Clintons or harriedly selected gift tomorrow morning when I get up, because she is off on a spa day, and will be staying there until after lunch. So Mother's Day has become a bit haphazard. Also because mum thought she WOULD be back for lunch, so didn't get my dad and I anything to eat in her absence - dad suggested going out, and I had to point out it would be Mother's Day, and that would probably be a nightmare.

So somehow today turned out to be needlessly aggravating. On the other hand, the Hospice have offered me shifts every Saturday, rather than just alternate Saturdays, which will make getting a regular routine going a little easier. And I thought I'd be working those shifts alone, but it turns out they're hiring a paid receptionist to do admin work over the weekends and man the station if people need toilet breaks and stuff, so I'll even have some form of company. So that's turned out quite nicely actually.
girlofprey: (R for raygun)
I thought I was going to have to work yesterday, shortly after getting back from Oxford. But it turned out I didn't, because the slot they actually offered me was today, and I had a dentist appointment booked. So instead I just went and had a dentist's appointment instead, with a slight cold, which meant every now and then I had to stop and cough before I could let her in my mouth again. I think she was pretty glad she was wearing a mask. She also seemed pretty concerned about some of my back teeth, what with the wear and all. I'm not surprised, I've been feeling some odd dints in them for a few months. I suspect the best thing I could do would be to stop eating big chunky chocolate bars I really have to get my teeth into. But I love the chunky ones the best, so I'm not sure that's a sacrifice I really want to make.

My adventures lately have included playing Far Cry 4. It's a great game, and really pretty, but whereas Far Cry 3 shows you the main character's crossover from ordinary guy to jungle killer and gives you some idea why he has a ton of random skills, Far Cry 4 - doesn't. So I'm forced to assume my current character was raised like Hit Girl, specifically to come to the country in the game and win a civil war single-handed. The NPCs keep making comments about him being an 'expert marksman', and 'who trained him?', so there's every chance that will be the reason. I will be really happy if it is.

My cat did something pretty adorable yesterday. She was flipping about the living room, all restless, and then she went over to the planter where her toys are kept, which was laid on it's side. She couldn't scoop them out because the side was too steep, but she hooked one ball (with a sort of lattice surface) with her claw, got it out, and started playing with it. I've never seen her do that before. I was very impressed.

I'm meant to be working (volunteering) on Saturday, but I'm pretty sure I'm due a period any time now. So we'll see how that goes.
girlofprey: (Slytherpuff Shoot in the Leg)
My dad has gotten us a new modem, and maybe internet, and now for some reason it takes my computer minutes to connect when I switch it on. Even when I just get it out of standby mode. In fact, I think I've had to do something to connect it every time. Meanwhile my Playstations connect just fine. It's quite irritating.

I have been gone for some time. I didn't wander out into Antarctica to die, I was just playing the new Saints Row game. It's quite fun. And very pretty. I sort of wish it was a full game, with clothes and tattoos and everything. And the flying in it is AMAZING. My fave character, Dane Vogel, came back, and he wasn't exactly like he was in his first appearance, but it was a plausible change after losing to death and spending ten years in hell. And he was funny. I love him. AND A BUNCH OF THINGS FROM MY FIC BECAME CANON. Woo.

I was looking up Borderlands to see if any new game add-ons were out, and it turns out they're remastering the Pre-Sequel and 2 for the Playstation 4. I don't have high hopes after some of the remasters I have seen, but it's called 'The Handsome Collection' and it's coming out on my birthday. So. I will probably get that.

I'm training to volunteer at the hospice now, but apparently I can't start properly because one of my references hasn't come back. It's the one from that dude from my last volunteering place. STILL WAITING ON HIM APPARENTLY. I'll have to call and ask if he can either get on that, or if I should ask for one from someone else. I don't know who. Maybe my Jobcentre woman. Anyone else.
girlofprey: (R for raygun)
Last night Dragon Age crashed because of an error, and I didn't think much of it, but today when I turned it back on as it was loading up the menu it said "Save data corrupted, and could not be retrieved" and for a minute I thought I was going to have to replay the first 40 hours again.

It turned out I did not, it was just that I couldn't have the 'Continue' option so it had to reload the menu. Still fucking terrifying though.

In other news I am on my period and nearly out of Mefenamic Acid. I noticed on Friday, too late to get my prescription refilled before Monday. I actually have enough to last me till then, since I can't have more than 3 a day, and I had cramps yesterday anyway, despite taking a pill. But it was a slightly more stressful day than it needed to be, which was a shame.

I also got my DBS check back from - wherever that comes from. So I can call the volunteering place and tell them I'm ready to start, pretty much. I sort of forgot that's going to mean I have to start getting to a place for work for 9am every other Saturday. Oh well, hopefully I will rise gracefully to that challenge.
girlofprey: (Girl Blue Hair)
I went to Thought Bubble today, West Yorkshire's yearly comic book convention. Spent more than I meant to, as usual, but I can afford it for now. And some of it was stuff I would have gotten anyway, so I probably saved on shipping. This line would work better on me if I didn't know there are a couple of PS4 games coming out in the next few weeks that I want and that will be hella expensive. Umm.

But anyway - I stopped off on the way back from Leeds and ended up walking home for about an hour. It started raining, but just gently, so I didn't bother getting my umbrella out. It took about twenty minutes for me to realise actually I had quite a few cloth and paper bags filled with paper comic books, and probably their condition would be optimum if I didn't let them get soaked through with rainwater. Some of their covers are wrinkly and a signature got smudged. But other than that, they're okay folks!

I also handed in my DBS form to start volunteering yesterday. I have to have a DBS check (basically a CRB check) before I can properly start and be left on my own, which will talk about six weeks. At the interview the woman who's sort of the head volunteer said I could come in and train while waiting for it to come back, since I didn't need a DBS check for that - but when I handed in the form, that woman's superior said the check would take about six weeks and to 'call them' when it came back so I could get started. So I don't know when something will next happen now. In six weeks or this week. I'll have to wait and see.
girlofprey: (R for raygun)
  • Gotham is doing everything right. I LOVE FISH MOONEY. And kind of ship her hardcore with Penguin.


  • I also loved the last few episodes of Brooklyn Nine Nine way more than the first three. I think I'm just not that fussed about Santiago/Perralta. Which I knew anyway, but. I've preferred the last few episodes of team/Jake-Holt shenanigans way more.


  • I'm going into town today to get a beanbag, because my current set-up for playing games - sitting on my bed with a slightly beat-up mattress - is kind of fucking up my back I think, and a beanbag is the best solution I can come up with. I told my mum about this plan, and as per usual when anyone tells her anything about what they're going to do, she started thinking of problems with it and reasons why maybe I should just do nothing instead. She asked if I couldn't Google 'bed back rest' instead. I somehow suspect I won't have better results with that than just getting a beanbag.


  • My interview on Thursday went pretty well, in the end. There seemed to be some misgivings about whether my problems with depression were a good fit for a hospice where a lot of people die, but hopefully I made it clear I don't think it will be. Like, I can't guarantee anything, but you can get depressed at home, and at least when you're volunteering you're helping. We'll see I suppose. They seemed pretty happy to be getting someone to help out with weekends, anyway. I'm apparently going to get some papers through the post pretty quickly so I can continue with the application. I haven't received them yet, but fingers crossed soon.


  • Every night since Bonfire Night I've seen better fireworks from surrounding houses/pubs than I saw on Bonfire Night. I hope this trend continues for the rest of my life.
girlofprey: (R for raygun)
I literally have no idea what I am supposed to do to prepare for this interview tomorrow. I assume I'm only having it at all because I want to volunteer at a medical facility, so they can't just let anyone come and have access to patient information, they have to check people out a little first. In which case my main task is to not commit any crimes before tomorrow morning, and to just seem like a normal friendly person. But maybe it IS also going to kind of be an interview, and I might really screw myself by not being prepared. But maybe if I'm too prepared and intense they'll find it a little weird and not want to let me come. It all sounded like a bit of a formality, but I'd rather be prepared-ish anyway. Also, when the woman called up to arrange the interview time, she said something about interviews being what they usually do 'when they have a couple of application forms come in', so I don't know if I'm in competition with other people for this thing.

I'm basically casting an eye over their website to see what they do and what services they offer, then review the notes I took for the Social Care course I took in 2010 that I mentioned on the application form in case they bring it up and 'umm....' isn't a good enough answer, and then I'm going to vaguely try to remember what else I put on the application form and what I could say about it if they ask. And then I'm going to watch Youtube videos. And hope I wake up in time to actually go to the interview tomorrow.

Speaking of Youtube videos, I don't even watch The Walking Dead, but this still somehow hilarious to me:



I HAVE BEEN SINGING LA-BIBBIDA-BIBBA-DUM FOR SOME TIME NOW.
girlofprey: (R for raygun)
Halloween was on Friday. I enjoyed Halloween. I made a Spooky Songs playlist, and just about had it finished before I went to bed and it wasn't very appropriate to listen to it again for another year. Also there were a bunch of songs I wanted to put on, but for some reason my laptop won't recognise a lot of my older CDs as CDs so I couldn't rip them. I could buy the MP3s, but I am loathe to pay for them having already paid for them. I could get the MP3s for free but I have forgotten how to do it while simultaneously avoid viruses. I'll try again next year.

But my point is that it's Bonfire Night - and my dad's birthday - on Wednesday, and I realised that after then we are technically into Christmas season, as far as I'm concerned. Also my YN's birthday is in early December, as a little ambush event. He's just old enough to realise if someone forgot to get him something, and to be discerning between presents, so I'll have to get ready for that. Ugh. I LOVE HIM. But ugh. Also about a million PS4 games are coming out, which will be hella expensive. I'll have to choose wisely among them.

I sent in my application form for the Hospice, and they called me up to come in for an informal interview on Thursday. It's nice that that's bobbing along, but I remembered that I'll probably have to dress semi-formally if I start working there, and probably for the interview, so I'll have to get some new clothes. And shoes probably. I always used to work in low-heeled boots, but the ones I used to wear fell apart long ago, and I remember it was a pain to get them. I'll have to check through my wardrobe to see if I have anything suitable, and if not buy some more. And a shirt. And probably some work jumpers, since the weather's finally on the turn. It's not that bad, the position's only for one half-day a fortnight. The problem with the shoes is that the Hospice is on an awkward road. I'll either have to get into town and walk quite a way down and along from there, or get a bus and then walk through a bunch of estates I don't really know to get there. I'd rather not have to do that in uncomfortable shoes. I'll have to check out my wardrobe tonight.

So my plan for tomorrow is to go into Wakefield, buy a new shirt (preferably blue), buy my dad a card and present, and maybe buy some new work shoes. It's funny how once you start spending money you tend to have to continue spending money. But you do tend to get things you need. So.

Thought Bubble's coming up in a couple of weeks. Oof.

I hate Tracy on Coronation Street, but she did have quite a funny line about a carriage clock on Friday. We missed a chunk of that episode, so I had to catch up today. Also saw David being like "well, we thought he was up to something and he was, so". I missed quite a lot of Emmerdale this week too, after having to go out on Wednesday, and caught up mostly yesterday. Charity is spectacular. I'm glad the show remembered that. Also spectacular is Nicola. And I love Ross even though he's a bit shit. And Debbie. Well, I love quite a lot of people. They should whittle the show down to just the people I love, and let them have a show of their own, is what I'm saying.
girlofprey: (R for raygun)
I have found an old LJ entry from September 2010 about going to college, and I don't remember going to college in the last couple of years except for that Health and Social Care course. LJ is literally the best way of keeping track of things I've done in my past I have. But I don't know that it's reliable enough to put down on an application form. And I'm pretty sure my First Aid qualification has run out anyway. I will probably put it down anyway.
girlofprey: (R for raygun)
Nearly done with my volunteering application form, except that I'd like to mention a short Health and Social Care course I did, along with some First Aid training. But it was a couple of years ago and I honestly can't remember the year, never mind the dates. I've been through my drawer of Useful Documents, found the notes I took from the course, but not any dates. Hmph.
girlofprey: (R for raygun)
I just noticed I got another email from my volunteering place, after replying today, advertising an internal vacancy.

Maybe I shouldn't stop volunteering there. Maybe I should work there permanently and take over and fix them from the inside. The email was forwarded and the original guy asked my volunteering man to send it to any volunteer that had completed induction, but maybe 'work for us don't leave work for us' is what my VM is really trying to say.
girlofprey: (R for raygun)
I called and emailed my volunteering people again yesterday, as a sort of 'last chance' thing, and I mostly expected no-one to answer so I could just get on with things. The call went to voicemail, as all my calls there do, but I did get a reply to the email about 4 hours after I sent it. Telling me I could come in Tuesday or Thursday if I wanted. Tuesday was a little short notice, and I'm having a haircut on Thursday, so it's out anyway. But. Now it's like I actually have to inform them it was just a polite email, I don't really want to come in anymore.

I emailed the guy back today to say I couldn't come in this week, but I would like to talk to him in the office at some point. He said he was in the office on Friday, then off again next week (??), then back in the last week of October. It's like, I do want to explain that they're doing great work with their organisation and everything, but I'm not really enjoy the lack of organisation and being constantly left hanging so that's why I'm going. But I don't really want to say it in an email, since the entire office gets those, and I don't want to do it over the phone, especially when I can never get through when I actually feel geared up to do it. So I've got to make a whole trip into the office to have a conversation about how I don't want to come into the office anymore, and if I don't do it on Friday, I have to wait till the end of October to get it really sorted out.

Also on Friday Dragon Age: Inquisition comes out, whether or not I actually start playing it then depends on if I can get my hands on the edition I want, but chances are good I will be incognito from that day forwards for a bit. And I really won't want to be in Wakefield explaining to a charity man than his volunteering gig is shit.

Anyway. In Emmerdale news, Priya's boyfriend is almost unbearably attractive, and I really hope they don't make him evil. They've been doing a pretty good job of that so far. Please don't make him another abusive POC, please please please. Also Priya is pretty crazy attractive too, I would say they should have kids but they already have one each, and I don't know if the world could bear it.

A fandom thing: When you read a fic and it so completely wastes all the potential of its premise that it makes you slightly sad for the entire pairing.
girlofprey: (R for raygun)
  • I am on my period and yesterday I was in so much pain, even with my pills, that I found it hard to stomach the idea of lunch until about 5 o'clock. I think I'm going to have to talk to my doctor or something about this, because even apart from all my mental health stuff, I can't imagine being able to work again and go through this every month. Like, I'm not sure what else I can do, I'm already on prescription medication so I don't know where else I can go except to something like codeine or a medically-induced coma every month. Neither of which would probably help me work. But feel like I need to ask something about it.


  • My volunteering place has gone off the radar again. I last volunteered a week last Tuesday, and I emailed them the next day to ask when I could come in again, since we didn't arrange it in-office. I suggested this Tuesday, but I got no reply, so I waited until Monday and then called three times and emailed again. No answer. I didn't go in and haven't heard anything from them. So. Hmm. All I can think is maybe they evaporated when I left them last. My CBT also finished last week, so I pretty much have no commitments at all right now. Which wasn't really where I wanted to be when I finished that stuff.


  • Speaking of my CBT, when I was in my last appointment my therapist recommended I re-refer myself to the service to have more therapy, since I still have some issues we didn't get around to working on and the waiting list in 9 months, so I may as well put my name down and see if I want it in 9 months. So I called them on Monday to do that, they said they'd call back to do an assessment on Wednesday. And then suddenly they started wigging out when I mentioned I'd only just finished a course of CBT last week. I had to be put on hold, then wait for a call from an actual therapist, then wait for a call from a supervisor, then wait for another call from the therapist again. In the end my referral's going through, I think, and they guy on the phone assured me I'd been 'very pragmatic'. They just didn't know how to encourage me to use the CBT stuff I'd learned to 'be my own therapist' when I was planning to come back, and they couldn't ask my therapist since he's off on leave. He did not make it sound like it would be this much trouble when we talked about it. So now I'm waiting a couple of weeks to apparently get a call from him when he gets back, to - as far as I can make out - talk about stuff we already talked about in my last session about relapse prevention and going forward and trying to use CBT on my own. So. Yeah.


  • The Conservatives want to further control what people on benefits do and how they spend their ill-gotten welfare money and are arseholes and I hate them


  • I once got so confused between the names 'Conservatives' and 'Tories' that I called them the 'Conservatories', and sometimes that's all I can think about when I talk about them.


  • In a move, or situation rather, that would probably infuriate the current government, I want to spend my money on all the things but I have to save it because a bunch of games I want to buy are coming out soon, hmph.
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